Betty Who wants everyone to know she’s sorry. The Australian singer-songwriter, who uses she/they pronouns, has long been an advocate and member of the LGBTQ+ community since her breakout in 2012. However, she fell into some hot water when discussing her heteronormative relationship with her husband, Zak Cassar, on the Made It Out podcast with Mal Golwenke on August 19.
TL;DR: The Hadestown alum got candid talking about how her sexuality has fluctuated over the years. She then name-dropped another celeb as an example when speaking about the fluidity of queerness, which came off as lesbophobic to some listeners.
On August 28, Betty issued an apology to the queer community with a message written on her Instagram Stories.
“In recent days, I’ve taken time to sit with the conversation around my gender and sexuality. I recognize that the language I used poorly articulated my experience and unintentionally reinforced ideas that were harmful or dismissive, particularly toward the lesbian community,” she wrote, in part. “That was never my intention, and I’m truly sorry. Everyone’s journey is deeply personal, and I shouldn’t have spoken in ways that generalized or spoke for others.”
Betty explained that she went into the interview to discuss her own journey with gender and sexuality, which led to her landing on “in-between” labels for both.
“I went into the interview to discuss my own journey specifically, how I figured out how to identify myself and how I ultimately landed on non-binary and bisexual, both assignments that live somewhere in-between,” she continued. “I understand there is so much nuance in this conversation, and in other people’s lived experiences, that my comments did not reflect. I also recognize that I’m coming from a place of privilege, and I never meant to contribute to prejudice against the community.”
She then closed her message, saying, “The LGBTQ+ community is my home; it’s where I came alive, found my people, and learned more about love, acceptance, and tolerance on a deeper human level. I will do better.”
If you’re wondering how we even got here in the first place, allow us to break down every piece of Betty Who’s sexuality and Made It Out podcast drama.
Betty made a hypothetical comment about Reneé Rapp on the Made It Out podcast.
During her Made It Out podcast episode (which is titled “Being Queer In A Straight Relationship”), Betty was asked about fellow queer celebs JoJo Siwa and Fletcher’s recent hard launches of their relationships with men.
“I have so much space and love for those women who are probably going through it right now,” Betty responded. “I think it’s hard when you become representative of something to other people, and then you change or you are just following your heart, and then that means other people feel that they are not represented anymore. The pressure of that is so immense.”
She continued, “A huge part of queerness is identifying yourself and putting yourself under, you know, the alphabet mafia. It’s like, ‘Which one are you?’”
Later in the conversation, she name-dropped Reneé Rapp while explaining a hypothetical scenario of the “Kiss It Kiss It” singer’s sexuality evolving.
“Reneé Rapp is like, ‘You’ll never catch me dating a man,’” Betty said, before adding, “Like, ‘Go off, queen. I love that for you!’ But I also hold space for her in 10 years if she goes, ‘Oops, I met the love of my life and it’s this man, I didn’t mean to.’ It’s like, that’s okay!”
Fans weren’t pleased with her approach.
While Betty encouraged the idea of giving queer women grace for exploring the fluidity of their identities, fans were quick to call her out for seemingly insinuating that lesbianism is a phase and that people would eventually find “the right man.”
“Betty Who is the perfect example of why lesbians choose to be les4les because you guys show no community with us and think we just haven’t found the right man… yeah ima be les4les till i die,” one person wrote.
The comments section of the clip also struggled to side with her POV, with one fan writing, “Saying ‘Alphabet Mafia’ tells me everything I needed to know.”
Another person criticized her comments about being in a heteronormative relationship as a queer person, writing, “She really said, ‘It shouldn’t be illegal for you to fall in love’ as if gay marriage isn’t still illegal in so many places.”
While Reneé Rapp hasn’t chimed in, King Princess has seemingly entered the chat.
Days after Betty’s Made It Out episode went live, queer artist King Princess posted a TikTok seemingly aimed at her comments.
While she didn’t name names, the “Upper West Side” singer said, “You are not a victim because you started dating a man, and queer people are disappointed in you because you used the queer community to market your music. They feel betrayed. That’s fair, you have to live with that.”
They continued, “To get up on a podcast and claim this victimhood when you’re in a position of privilege—dating a man in a heteronormative society—is ridiculous, and it is not going to resonate with people,” later adding, “We live in a country where our rights are being stripped from us everyday, and you think it’s important to go on a podcast and talk about how hard it is to be in a heteronormative relationship? Diva!”
In the comments section, King Princess clarified that the post wasn’t targeted at anyone specific, writing, “Btw this is not about ONE PERSON, this is about the many divas who felt the need to do this THIS YEAR.”
Betty issued her public apology two days after King Princess’ TikTok was posted.
